It's one of those rare moments where the babies are having their morning nap and I haven't succumbed to needing one myself. Okay so I have gotten back into bed, but its cosy here and my favourite place to sit between the morning nap and the 10am play time.
I have so much to share with you all but I also think so much of it may just be a) boring or b) me droning on for hours and hours about routines, baby spit and nappy sizes.
So in a (welcome?) break from our regular viewing, here is a rather inspiring New Years idea that we will be taking a bash at this year (as long as I remember) I like the idea so much I hope to do it every year.... As long as I don't forget blah blah
Today's picture theme is christmas tree, this is the first time they have ever seen one....so we had to get the twinkliest one in the store (sorry mr credit card ;) )
Dear babies;
I'm having one of those panic moments where I wish I could just pause everything...
When did you get so big?
I've been happily going along singing, playing, feeding, changing ad infinitum, while lots of lovely new things happen each day, be it a smile, a new noise, finding ones own mouth or something exciting you never noticed before. We have been taking each day as it comes and sure we've let some things pass us by but we've definitely had more laughter than tears.
I fed Gaius today, boy is he heavy now, and his feet touch the sofa cushion while he's sat on my knee....when did that happen? Ayla fits into her newborn clothes and no one is in tiny baby clothes anymore....when did that happen? Zarek spends more time smiling than crying....when did that happen? Did I blink? Was I too tired, Did I not see?
I sniff the tops of your heads at every 6am feed, I inhale deeply, desperate to remember your warm baby smell before you grow...but I never can recall it.
I know you won't remember this time we share, and I'm starting to think I won't either as the more I want to preserve it, the faster it slips through my fingers and pictures don't do you justice....I guess it will have to be enough just to know that we lived it, to know I held you once, when you were tiny, for the very first time, how I bent my head and smelt you for the very first time. Even if I don't remember the smell of your head, I can remember that i sniffed your neck as you fed and ill remember I never wanted to forget it.
A lovely surprise waiting for me in nicu this morning, a happy birthday card from the triplets. The staff went to a lot of effort making it for me last night. Brought on lots of happy tears to have something so personal from them. Had special girly birthday cuddles from Ayla and then a KFC bucket in the "living area" with my parents who had come to visit the babies.
Eternal thanks to the nicu staff. Can't believe how much better I'm feeling now just being near them, I had no idea being separated from the babies was affecting me and Dom as much as it was thank god the nicu staff realised my breakdowns were not normal hormones but that i was in distress and struggling to manage the anaemia and coming to see the babies. They went to every effort to get us a room! Staying in the hospital flat now is such a relief, I can finally feel myself relaxing knowing they are just eight doors away and that the walk takes mere moments and not half an hour! Feeling like I have more energy already, be gone wretched anaemia!
Born 11 weeks premature but fighting fit I am now the proud mum of nearly 4-day-old triplets.
Gaius Oliver Herring, Ayla Evelyn Herring and Zarek Leonard Herring were born at 18:22, 18:23 and 18:25 on the fourth of August by emergency c-section. Despite being extremely early all babies were on Cpap (assisted breathing environment) for less than a day before demonstrating how well their lungs had grown and that they could breathe for themselves. They may be small and need time to grow and learn to feed but they are excellent weights and doing well in our local neonatal unit. I am rooming below on the maternity ward recovering from surgery and seeing them at regular intervals, it's overwhelming to have them here safe and sound and brings tears of joy and relief on a seemingly hourly basis. I can't believe they are really all mine...
Well it's me, talking to you from the future (insert cool and spooky sound effects).
Are you ready?
That guy you're seeing - the fella you decided was "the one". You're right. It'll take everyone else a bit of time to see it but you know your own mind, you have good instincts - trust them. Things may not last forever, things are not going to be easy - you're going to go through some very, very terrible times - remember it is healthier to feel pity than anger and remarkably easier to get back up than stay on the ground.
You're going to get married. You'll never feel so calm and certain about anything in your life more than on your wedding day.
Your having babies.
Really - babies - that plural in there....it's three babies - triplets even.
I know how it sounds, I would never have believed it either. You're going to go through a time when you don't think children are ever going to happen, you're going to wish you could just know everything will work out so you can stop worrying, crying and praying for a miracle.
You'll get your miracle, just when you think you can't go any further than you have or take any more pain than you have, the most amazing and unexpected thing will happen all by itself.
You'll learn the pain you went through was important - it's not going to be easy but your frame of mind is strong enough to carry you through.
You'll realise your parents do understand you, they might not always agree with your decisions but they value that you made them for yourself.
Your going to be braver and stronger than you'd ever believe possible.
Your going to feel as if you're being tested repeatedly - don't take it too personally. Everything thrown at you can be handled. You may feel like each stumbling block is insurmountable, but once you pass it, you can look back down the mountain, and the big blocks will look tiny and you'll wonder why they ever bothered you so much.
Don't sweat the small stuff - everything always turns out okay. Even those days when it feels like the world is ending - tomorrow I promise it will be better.
Trust your body - it's a remarkable healer (you'll see what I mean one week in July) and can achieve the unexpected. Be happy with it, marvel at what it can do rather than focussing on what it can't.
Have fun, don't forget the bad things - they provide perspective for the good things - but don't obsess about them either.
Don't change too much. Don't beat yourself up when you haven't done the best you could - you, like everyone else, are learning as they go along. Have fun - you're good at doing that, stay compassionate, be kind and try to listen more.
Your house will be filled with joy and laughter more often than it's filled with tears.
Well we've already been in and out of hospital while the doctors thought my waters went on Monday. We still don't know what has happened but I can tell you I'm a paranoid mess now. My local hospital won't take my babies until I reach 30 weeks so at 26+2 when admitted there was lots of scary talk about being sent somewhere random in the UK, and low chances of baby survival. I'm now home, feet up, not daring to do anything and feeling paranoid that every twitch is the start of premature labour.
I'm sure in a few days and with a bit more normality the fear that babies are arriving too soon for them to be healthy will be firmly in the back of my mind.
I had a scan and everyone still has lots of fluid so we're hoping this has all been a big load of worry over nothing, but there is still the risk that labour could happen tomorrow, or hopefully might hold off for weeks and weeks yet to come.
For sure, every day now is a blessing and one more than we had on Monday.
Very anxious in our house, D is being great and chipper and I was being brave and strong when in hospital, but now I'm home I feel vulnerable and tearful that we could have come so close to the finish line and the babies not made it.
Many tissues and chocolates are being consumed in our house this week.
Had our 25/26 week scan and BOY do they treat me differently there now. Almost like a film star LOL Everyone wants a look at the "triplet lady" and to sit in on my appointments so my dear consultant now also treats me very well, everyone is really friendly, cheerful and pleasant and my consultant is nothing but positive - about ruddy time!!
We are doing better than he thought, I have two big babies almost singleton size and one smaller baby. He expected two small babies and one more dominant. We talked about the small baby (boy#2) and he's not overly concerned since he's a triplet and size variations do occur but we're going to keep an eye on him since it's possible his small head could be a sign of something - or it just as easily be absolutely nothing. I'm not really worried, just glad to be mentally prepared just-in-case. I was a bit worried when the first measurement said boy#2 hadn't grown in a fortnight but re-measuring showed definite growth but he's considerably smaller than his siblings, or just has a small head.
They are supposed to be having me back in two weeks for another scan but there was no space in the appointment book so the receptionist was trying to fob us off (I wasn't going home without that appointment) out comes our consultant guns blazing, gets me booked in and will scan me himself if no one is available! BIG IMPROVEMENT on my level of care!!
So for the past ten years, maybe even twenty, I have worried my bottom lip over whether my waistline is too "comfortable". I always worried in an offhand way, "today I look chubby, maybe I should do more sports, eat less candy." I didn't crash diet or do much in the summer other than start going to do more sports, (it was summer sports are fun in the sun) or spend more hours in the local pool. Then winter rolls round and I happily stuff my face with whatever I can get my hands on and at some point stare at my waist and wonder...."Do I look big in this?"
How ironic that now I'm pregnant with triplets I actually spend far more time worrying, "am I eating enough....should I eat more fruit....am I getting big enough" I see pictures of my bump buddy - also having triplets and 7-14 days ahead of me, who looks far larger than I am. So then I worry my bottom lip again and get concerned that I'm not doing as well as I could be.
Week 14
The serious irony is looking at the above picture I marvel at just how tiny my waistline really was, particularly compared to now.
That said, size is subjective. After all, other than the odd glimpse of myself in a shop window or reflective surface all I see is my bump from the top looking downwards.
How ironic that people's comments of "gosh you look ready to drop" being replaced by comments of "you look so tidy, you'd never believe there were three in there" could cause such neurosis.
Week 24
It doesn't help that when I conceived it was just as I was recovering from my very, very poorly christmas time and that I was underweight at my first midwife appointment.
I guess as long as the weight gain continues (I was 9 stone1 at 8 weeks, then 11stone7 at 22+5 weeks) I shouldn't worry. But it's hard not to.
I know only I can bake these babies, (what tremendous pressure!!) and I hope we can get to 35+ weeks, but have no control over when my body has enough and it's not like I can physically force-feed the babies to fatten them up in case of an early arrival.
Obviously, I am growing and my bump (and hopefully babies) are growing well too. I am just experiencing nerves and paranoia that this may all be over before I or they are ready and I want to cook them for as long as I can. I want them to be able to, like any baby coast through their first few weeks, not fight for their lives.
Neurosis aside, the worst factor is not knowing WHEN the end will be. I can dream of reaching the gold topped pyramid of 37 weeks but very few triplets pregnancies progress past 33 weeks, for now the most I can do is hope, pray and continue my life as a sofa dweller.
On a very happy note now past the 25 week mark; "If my babies were born today, they would probably survive the ICU, as their tiny lungs CAN breathe. This week they SHOULD (if they're good) start scootching out of breech and rotating into a head-down position for their grand entrance into the world."
I apologise to those of you who came across this post while it was mis-titled "cock conspiracy" - I bet your very disappointed.
I awoke around 10am if you believe the bedroom clock or 6am if you believe the kitchen clock, because I was sure I could hear voices. Having recently purchased a 42 inch tele' to replace the one that "broke" and having had twinkletoes ring me yesterday to say she was nearly burgled I've been a tad paranoid that someone is going to "nick" it. Particularly since realising (as twinkletoes was talking about her close call) that I had left all the windows downstairs wide open all night.
So I wake up, suffering terrible leg and hand cramps - oh the joys of pregnancy - so am unable to leap up (who am I kidding I haven't been able to leap or move in an agile manner for at least five months) and instead kick D awake while whispering "the clock says it's 10:30....are we being burgled? It doesn't sound like 10:30" (it didn't the road outside was silent and birds were chirping).
Poor D having been nearly crushed by preggers here seemed to think I thought someone was stealing the time or the clock - he grinned inanely at me, and rolled over and back to sleep.
I decided I would have to go investigate, and possibly get shot by the burglars because now I desperately needed the loo and felt violently sick (someone forgot to take her medicine last night)
Bathroom business completed I edged downstairs, peering out of windows and wondering if some kind of Zombie or flood related holocaust had emptied the world of people. The sky was slightly grey but the weather is foul so what can be expected. I reach the kitchen, swing my medicine and note the clock in here says it's 6am - darnit! Now feel doubly nauseous from realising I've been asleep only four hours...
I turn on the tele' - yes it's still here and the news kindly informs me it's actually...dum dum dum.....it's not even quite 5AM!!! WTH! Am so "surprised" nausea turns into full fledged exorcist moment, (saldy d is still fast asleep and could not be relied on for hair-holding, back rubbing, hand holding or any sympathetic murmuring. The news informs me we can expect even more "rain" today. tomorrow and for the rest of eternity.
At this rate we are going to need an arc, and I clearly need a new household timezone....or clock batteries.
I hope everyone on the interweb is doing well! I haven't been around much, in a somewhat vain effort to avoid posting nothing but baby related updates! All I seem to do now is dash to the loo, throw up, sleep or go for check-ups. Highly thrilling I know. Time is accelerating away from me, I can't believe it's been 5 MONTHS that I've been lugging my bump around (it feels like 5 minutes) and I'm getting more and more nervous at the fact the babies are coming any time between now and 12 weeks *gulp* That seems so soon!
We spent so long preparing for the "worst" that now we might actually get the best I'm not entirely sure how to process it all! I don't think any of it will actually sink in until the babies are all lying in a cot in front of me, all breathing by themselves, and the hospital tells us we can go home.
Then I may have an ever so slight emotional break-down that the worry that they won't make it is over.
(I have pre-warned D that if everything is actually fine I'm more likely to lose it than if the babies need help)
D and I are getting ridiculously excited now, we've finally settled on names and think (other than a triple pram) we now have pretty much everything we need. Many thanks to the family, friends and strangers who have sent furniture, clothes, play things and more!
It's our 4th wedding anniversary today so we're off out for Thai food - something which will no doubt give me heartburn, but hey, what doesn't give me heartburn now ;)
I promise to post more, you'll be hearing from me weekly now the first danger zone has passed (babies now have a 40% chance of survival if I have them now) much better than the "you statistically might not get to 24 weeks" that the consultant said to us 12 weeks ago. I was admittedly a little afraid to post too much about them, or too neurotically about my fears in case the worst did happen - and then I wouldn't know how to move forward.
So far though, so good. Lot's of prayers and crossed fingers going around our house now.
So last night it didn't matter what i was dreaming about (horse racing, walking, junk yards) I still kept dreaming about apple crumble and custard. I could even smell it. I woke up this morning and the smell continued to follow me around the house- it wasn't until I sniffed my hands that I realised the new moisturiser i used last night (smells like vanilla and baileys) was to blame. As I'd slept the skin over my bump had heated and make a warm vanilla smell that my mind had tried to "sleep identify" as delicious custard and what do i have custard with - crumble. I'm going to have to make a crumble today now to satisfy the cravings! I even announced to D when he got up at 5am (in a very whiny voice) that I wanted crumble and custard before turning over and going back to sleep. Poor D didn't know what to say or do while he got ready for work, it was clear he wasn't sure if I meant I wanted him to now, at 5am start cooking a crumble or if I was just informing him so he can pick up some custard on his way home from work. Poor D.
Dear Hoody has tagged all the members of her royal court, and as 'Ambassador of Foreign Affairs' it's time to give my biast opinions on the following questions in the hopes of "cultural learnings for betterment of the royal court" and other nonsensical-ness.
1. Book or movie and why?
Book. Book. Book. I always prefer to read a book before I see the film since my imagination always does better than the film makers (pitbulls as muttations, what are you trying to do, give me an anyurism?), and to be fair most films end up cutting out some important parts - like the plot.
That said - I have been known to sit through bleak house, Jane Eyre, and Anna Karenina in film version to avoid reading the book. Sometimes the language and how complicated the story can be - (I'm looking at you J.R.Tolkien) has had me reaching for the movie rather than trying to muddle through who is doing what to whom in a crazy battle scene. That said, films do major battles way better than my imagination, one of the "cons" of living in a non-war torn country.
2. Real book or e-book?
Books - you can read my opinion on the kindle here.
3. Funniest thing you’ve done in the last 5 years?
Um, I assume this means funny to others? It must be my episode of caffeine and catnip. Although it does still make me giggle.
4. Do you put yourself in the books you read/movies you watch?
Only if character A is being being hurt by Character B - then I'll displace it onto D and be mad at him for however long it takes for the characters to resolve their s*it.
5. How would your best friend describe you?
Um, fun? We can be sensible debating something happening, giggling over cocktails or then we are dying our hair and dancing round the living room singing along to musicals like 5 yr-olds.
6. Favorite kind of car and why?
A free one? I'm going to say a DB9 just so I sound like I know something about cars. Otherwise my real answer is red one?
7. Would your choice of party be a catered meal or a barbecue out back?
Catered party / BBQ I don't care I love throwing parties and planning them, and catering them. But it has to be completely on my terms.
8. What’s your favourite season and why?
Freshly mowed grass in spring, but I love autumn, the colours, smells and the crisp feeling on the air.
9. What important lessons have you learned? Spiritual, educational, and occupational?
Spiritual: You're not alone.
Educational: Life gives the best education - unless you want to be a doctor or something. Mistakes are important steps and mostly fun to make. University is pointless unless you NEED a degree for your job - aka. doctor.
Occupational: Everyone spends time talking about how bad things are, but not many talk or are listened to about how good things are. There is something messed up with that.
And Baz Lurhmann said everything I value best:
10. Besides writing, what’s your favorite thing to do when you get some extra time?
Reading, gaming, cooking, listening to music or watching movies. These activities are all improved with the company of D.
11. What’s one place you can be found at least one time every week?
Currently only at home. But usually I end up at Sainsbury and the post office weekly (they are opposite each other) The post office is for work, Sainsbury is for chocolate and other wrongful goodies.
To comply with the rules - if you're reading this post - TAG - YOUR IT!
I don't know if it's because we're having multiples, or perhaps just because we know some lovely people, but the generosity we are receiving from others is very touching.
D and I are not "poor" and neither are we loaded.
We manage to pay our bills every month, buy the occasional extravagant item and have a meal or two out together.
We have no real debt's and overall we're happy with where we are financially.
Sure a bit of extra cash coming in from my side would be great (We wish we could afford to have some savings) and sure we do live a bit hand-to-mouth at times, but overall we live within our means.
Since announcing our triplet news (and yes buying three of most things is costly) we've been picking up bargains where we can.
By far the nicest thing we have received is the support and help from other parents and family members.
Dom's grandparents bought us round a 'meals on wheels' dish last night - my word it was delicious (I would have taken a photo but I wanted to eat it so bad I couldn't wait!). D is new to all this cooking melarky and while his attempts are (mostly) successful, the chance for a home cooked meal from someone who actually knows what she is doing was well received.
(So well received that later that night 'preggers' here went back into the kitchen and stood over the baking tray eating the leftovers with a fork.)
We have been given two cots FREE - these cots cost hundreds of pounds brand new and two kind-hearted families have simply given us their old ones along with other bits of nursery furniture which have saved us plenty of money, time and worry.
Family members are making us "care packages" for when the babies come and helping us sell our old household items.
My parents have been grabbing things they know are on my "list" from charity shops when they come across them (diaper genies etc.)
Friends have been providing me with much craved and hard-to-find snacks (thank you emmzie for the choc covered pretzels) as well as running some of my errands.
Random people off of the-book-of-face in my town have been sending me items of maternity wear so I can actually leave the house without wearing pjs.
The kindness is overwhelming. It really helps us to keep our bank account from spontaneously combusting and to get organised.
We really appreciate every offer of help we've recieved.
It feels to me like we're having these babies as a whole family and a large community, everybody wants to know how they are doing and is sending us good wishes and support. D and I are getting to enjoy spending time together before we become a family of 5, (cripes 5!) being excited over the future, without the excessive financial worries I'm sure many parents go through.
We've also now got enough stuff to warrant actually decorating and setting up the nursery and playroom. I wasn't planning on doing that until later, but having massive piles of baby-stuff sat everywhere is starting to bug me, maybe the house will stop looking like a jumble sale once we put things in their proper place (and not just continually on top of each other).
Paint samples here I come!!
Since we got married in July 2008 there was always a plan and it came in three phases;
Phase 1: Work
This part of the plan involved husband getting a job with steady, regular hours and decent progression prospects. Wife was looking to set herself up in business and start to rock the world.
Phase 2: Live
To be precise, where to live. Using the steady income from phase 1, we decided we wanted somewhere nice to live, and to surround ourselves with nice things, and lead active and full lives. This isn't to be taken as a greedy pursuit of stuff, but having lived in some awful, grotty grot-holes we kind of wanted somewhere that didn't affect our health, better yet maybe we could live somewhere that positively impacted our wellbeing! Similarly, we wanted to slowly get rid of the mismatched pile of hand-me-down furniture that was frankly on its last legs and slowly replace it all with new stuff that suited out taste. Besides, all of the above served as a precursor to phase 3.
Phase 3: Start our Family
With everything now in place, and by everything I mean a global business empire and a massive palatial home, we would be ready to have a child and start our family...
Of course, life is what happens when you're busy making plans....
After seven LONG weeks, I think maybe, just maybe the sickness is going away and the placentas are kicking in! I haven't actually been sick in a week now, but every morning I'm still having plenty of close calls.
I almost daren't hold my breath or mention it too much in case I jinx it!
Enter heartburn.
Yes just as I get away from being constantly sick, I now have a terrible burning sensation in the base of my throat. I'm pretty sure it's all my doctor's fault!
A few months ago he asked me if I was suffering from any sickness, I happily shook my head and told him none so far. The VERY NEXT DAY and for weeks onwards there I was head in the toilet, throwing up the rainbow.
I saw this doctor again on Thursday and this time he asked me if I had any heartburn. I happily shook my head and told him none so far.
On Friday I had a fire in my throat, and onwards nearly everyday since.
At least the next time he asks me if I'm experiencing a symptom I can prepare to get it the following day!
And happy news for you poor neglected souls, if the sick really is going away now I hope to get back to our usual scheduled bloggage and keep you all updated a few times a week, and check in on your blogs more that I have been doing!
So this is just a quick post today to say we're all doing just fine. I'm starting to get the odd fluttering feeling and both D and I can't decide if it's wind or babies! Either way, it's all getting pretty darned exciting. Fingers crossed I'm kicking morning sicknesses ass (FINALLY)
After our scan last week we found out we have trizygotic triplets. This means each baby has it's own placenta and no-one is sharing any "resources". This is the BEST kind of triplet to have as it reduces many inter-womb complications, although there are still risks to any multiple pregnancy from prematurity.
The triplets are likely to be fraternal and not identical, however they cannot be sure until birth, whether we actually have one set of identical twins and then another baby, or whether we are having three separate babies. Identical twins are unlikely as we have three placentas present and twins usually share one, but it is not unheard of.
I'm still throwing up all the time, and hoping to god that means they are all going to get as full term as possible. They say the sicker you get at the start the better the later stages should go. I seriously hope that's a fact as an alarming number of triplet pregnancies don't make it past 24 weeks. If we can just get as close as possible to 35 weeks (when I'm being induced) I will be relieved. Just another 24 weeks to go then....
On a depressing note, I've been told I can't have my babies at my local hospital (across the road from where I live) and will be shipped off anywhere in the country that can take me when I go into labour. I'm glad I will get the best care for us, but I am very anxious about being anywhere up to 600 miles from D and the strain that will put on him and his job as he wants to be with me when they arrive.
Still we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. For now I'm concentrating on baking these babies and have another scan later today to check their development - fingers crossed everyone is healthy and forming well.
So we're all good, all five of us.
Apart from sleeping through most of my days and nights the wonder drugs the hospital put me on have reduced vomiting to only the most inconvenient moments, such as when showering, or mid-conversation with someone. Other than that I'm free to eat and drink as before, minus the appetite I once owned.
I fly between giddy delight, excitement and utter terror at the drop of a hat.
The terror usually begins when I remember that I actually have to get these three babies out again, something I spend a great deal of my time trying not to dwell on.
I've managed to reconcile myself with having to close the business down 'temporarily' or at least for a year if not longer (it's probably going to be years) when I get too big, tired and run off my feet by little ones to dare multi-task two full-time roles.
The biggest reconciliation came when being told yet another frightening statistic for how the 3B's (much nicer than continually saying triplets, doncha think - the word 'triplets' starts to sound threatening after a while..) are likely to be in NICU or not make it if born too early. One ten minute crying jag at D about how our babies might die puts a heck of a lot into perspective I can tell you.
I still get scared, scared of trying to breastfeed three babies when I can't grow an extra boob, scared pregnancy is going to be uncomfortable to the point of pain as several triplet carriers have recounted and every now and then I want to put my hands up, book myself in at a clinic and make it go away because I'm almost certain I can't do this.
Then I inevitably remember that we're going to have three children and the happy gets in the way of all the throat-closing fear, at least temporarily.
No one in my town has had triplets for 10+ years, even the hospital is doing research into it, which doesn't fill me with the greatest feeling of security.
But I try remember it will all be okay, that I can deal with whatever comes my way and that any pain of discomfort is just a moment in time and will pass eventually.
D is a god among men, putting up with my orders that he completely guts the interior of the house, NOW, only to change my mind and decide that we need to move, to change it back when I don't want to leave our home.
I still catch him staring at me out of the corner of my eye, he murmurs how much he loves me in my ear all the time, tells me he's proud of what I'm doing, even when I fall asleep every time we try have movie or "alone time."
He is the embodiment of patience and is trying to both work full time, take care of me and the house, learn to cook and run parts of my business. Superman has nothing on him right now...well apart from the flying.
And I passed! Guess whose having a baby :) we re thrilled and have more exciting news to share tomorrow. Right now I'm in hospital with anti nausea medicine to curb my violent sickness
Viva Pizza - Only order from them if you want to receive a completely different meal to the one you ordered, and then to get argued at down the phone that his mistake is actually yours for not originally ordering what he sent you.
I have the boo-hoo's.
I feel rusty, and broken.
Since I got unbelievably sick in November (which I'm still recovering from) I've been having so many aches and pains it makes it difficult to work, live, be normal and blog.
Do I want to whine about my pain? No....Well, okay yes but I only want to whine at D, because whining is a sport where I obtain points for how red-faced and vein popping-outty he gets.
One day I really think I can make his head explode.
Awesome.
All my positive outlooks are now becoming fatalistic. Sure it's a nice day today but just you just wait until tomorrow.
I'd just pulled myself out of this funk last week (and finally returned to work) when I then fell down the stairs.
Funk returned with a vengeance.
And the stupid doctors put me on a new medication, which by their admission I don't really need 'but it's worth trying to see if it makes me better', and all that stuff has done is messed me up and made me really poorly again.
The world is lucky that I don't have access to missiles or a zombie army as with all the pain and PMT I'm having, I'd have probably launched them by now.
(Did I really just say that on the internet?)
So when I look at the shiny new thank-god-we're-alive world around me. I don't see unicorns and rainbows. I see ... well.. snow, but under the snow I see mud and slime and owies.
So to recap - everything sucks, I'm trying to explode D's brain, and I possibly made a faux pas internet statement.
I can usually pull myself out of such a mood, and am normally very optimistic, but things have become so quagmire-ish that I just can't seem to get outta this funk. Just as I pull my hand free, my waist sinks a few more inches.
I really need a vacation, or a girl's day to just eat, vent, get drunk, samba to the tango and then giggle all the way home. Most importantly I need to laugh, proper belly laugh, so if anyone has any films they can recommend for the intelligent ha-has please do.
I hate having the boo-hoo's
Today I was due to get my boiler fixed by a local plumbing firm - at one point I had four plumbers in the house all staring at the same boiler...
The whole time Roarke meowed, stared and generally attempted to exercise his powers of mind control.
He seemed completely uncertain as to why these four men - these four men he had allowed into his home - weren't sitting, snuggling, scratching and cuddling him.
Even worse.. they had blocked his route to the food bowls by pulling out the evil washer*
For an entire hour I was assaulted by cat question after cat question - meow this, meow that, 'why aren't they stroking me and telling me I'm awesome yet' meow.
Roarke is currently lucky that I didn't shut him in the boiler.
* When we first moved in someone, (D) didn't put the cold water pipe into the washer properly. The first time we used it the pipe shot off and sprayed cold water at the kitchen door, where incidentally Roarke was sat. The force of the water pinned him to the door. (it was really funny for us, not him)
He spent the following week jumping three feet in the air just to get past the washer to his food.
Our iPhone is determined to keep us awake. After twelve email notifications over twenty minutes we finally figured how to turn the darn thing on silent after which point el iPhone decided to send bright beams of light across the ceiling in the way of lightning to inform us that a new message had been received. Even after we brought the old phone back in to act as official waker-upper and relegated iPhone to the bedside draw it chose to use that opportunity to vibrate at us the news of new emails.
iPhone now sleeps downstairs at night.
iPhone sleep deprivation may also be why I fell down the stairs on Monday and have subsequently spent the last few days laid on the sofa like a turtle who can't get back up, my coccyx is NOT amused.
D being D keeps the iPhone just out of my reach and then snickers to himself when I try to get it.
Tomorrow I am supposed to take a three hour train ride....am desperately trying to buy children's inflatable swim toy or hemmarroid ring from eBay to make journey bare able.
Stupid coccyx.
Yes iPhone woot finally a way to blog on the go, although so far I have used my iPhone only to download 100 free game aps ... And I've had the phone for two hours .... Imagine what I could achieve by not sleeping tonight ...
Where have I been the past few days I hear you ask - well I have been going to bed at 4am each day....because I've become an Xbox addict.
I've played console games for many, many years and suddenly - with the introduction of a new dashboard (that's the 'home' menu screen for any plebs out there) one that tells me what my achievement ratio is like, (achievements are won by playing games and doing difficult tasks in game) has made me quite...obsessed about the whole thing.
The first time D worked out the ratio from the information on screen we laughed and I gloated at how my ratio was higher than his.
The following day after unlocking new achievements I asked him to recalculate....and then several times a day since then.
Poor D.
I began playing games to get 100% complete or 1000 of 1000 gamerscore. I've done this with FIVE games in the last month - count them - FIVE!!!! And have now become a complete addict. Every night I'm just trying to get "one more score" as D heads to bed at 9am. Come 4am I'm blinking at the screen wondering where my life just went...
I've even joined A FORUM, yes a FORUM. to talk with other addicts (everyone seems awake at 2am) and get tips on achievements I'm struggling with (trust me here some are VERY difficult to obtain)
I've even started buying my old games from 5 years ago on ebay so i can replay them - for more achievements. This is kind-of good as these games are mere pence now, but D keeps giving me the 'eye' particularly when he returns home and my "news of the day" is that I played monkey island three times today to unlock all the achievements and speed play achievements.
Heck as I'm writing this even I start wondering if I have a problem - but at the moment it's keeping me amused. By the end of December I want to get, and maintain, a minimum of 75% completion achievement score across all the games.
And obviously get as many games as I can fully completed
I know many of you know of my love of squirrels. Begun at the age of 5 with some rare red squirrels, continued by foamyand then encouraged by the ones that live at the bottom of the garden.
Well today I apparently have squirrels on the brain. Concerned about the lack of mr and mrs squirrel over the winter - they usually stop by every Sunday - I've completely over filled the bird table, feeders and covered most of the floor to lure them out.
Then I went shopping...
I returned home with this terrific pair of squirrel pjs with tiny squirrels on the bottoms. They are the cosiest, comfiest pj's I have EVER owned. The top even has the caption "I'm nuts about you"
And they have squirrels on them.....score!
Next...
Who could avoid buying these with that squirrel full of attitude on the cover. Seriously, I bought like six.
And then it wasn't until I arrived home and discovered later that evening the gift I bought for D...some brilliantly expensive chocolate-caramel-banoffee pie bar had a.....
Yes a squirrel in a TUX on it - classy chocolate ;)
EDIT: This morning mr squirrel was feeding at a neighbour's bird feeder...ten minutes later and with some stealthy moves mr squirrel is now feeding from the neighbours bird feeder at the bottom of MY garden - they're MY squirrels dammit!
Step 1 - conveniently leave cordless house phone in upstairs office
Step 2 - using one of many sites (I chose Amazon) request a callback
Step 3 - Choose option NOW not 'in 5 minutes'
GO!
Step 4 - Run out of living room and up flight of stairs
Step 5a - Remember you're ill and start panting ** Optional
Step 5b - Burst into office in way of TV cop show.
Step 6 - Hurdle pile of boxes and stock that you were going to put away later (laundry can be used if boxes are unavailable) and which is strewn across the entire floor
Step 7 - Start throwing empty boxes behind you (great for working the biceps)
Step 8 - Crawl under computer chair to reach desk
Step 9 - Answer phone
At my local supermarket on Sunday I discovered what I thought was another funny announcement board notice.
"Unwanted gift, Still wrapped - £45 call..."
I couldn't stop laughing at it and the ambiguity, D and I were discussing just how much we could get away with wrapping up our random junk worth mere £'s and turning it into £££'s by simply wrapping it in Christmas paper and putting an ad up.
...then I moved the card to discover the one above had plopped down over the top line entitled "Set of dumbells" - oh I see, the person writing the card wasn't as dumb as I first though...
Needless to say we adjusted the card back to it's funny style (dumbell line covered up) and left quietly while still giggling to ourselves.
So we add now to our lessons of "How to use a notice board"
Leave the top line BLANK - in case of upper card fall-age.
What group of people shall I hit since it's cheaper
I wonder if there is a loyalty 'kill 6 get one free' scheme
What if someone hired them to kill ME and that's why I've been so ill....
I wonder if that number really works....dare I ring it....?
I haven't rung it yet....I really want to...so if I get enough comments (because I am not doing this for myself - I mean...what if it's REAL)...I will ring and RECORD my conversation with el Assassin. So you all know what to do....give me 25 hits below and I'll hike to a phone box and ring the number... (because I'm not stupid enough to use my home or mobile phone.)
And let me know if you think I should be...
a) deadly serious on the phone about hiring an assassin
b) plain desperate - like totally unbelievably over-the-top desperate
c) treat it as a joke
d) use a funny accent and pretend to be a spy
e) give me your totally awesome idea for what I should do
(and if someone from abroad can please promise to take me in if this all goes very wrong and the police and international spies get involved, that'd be great.)
I read about this three stops, continues and starts idea on a fellow business owners blog and I liked it so much I decided to try answer them myself for the new year.
Three Stops
Leave the market - the footfall is dying and I can't see it working over the start of the new year, maybe mid-year it'll be better when they have finished renovations.
Worrying that some other people claim to do such sales that dwarf my own, my business speaks for itself and being around people who gloat or lie about their takings to wind-up other business holders is not healthy and shows their lack of decorum and business sense.
Letting paperwork pile up over a week so it seems like too much to do. Start doing it daily or bi-daily as it worked better that way before I formed a bad "it's not as important as sales" habit.
Three Continues
Using Amazon and price checking the entire inventory on a monthly basis.
Posting across our Facebook business page and profile.
Driving - Continue lessons in February and re-book test.
Three Starts
Open a shop and launch a website connected to it.
Make a work time-table to help best manage the time I have and how it should be spent on the different areas of the business. No more feeling like I'm dashing between home, work and on-line and doing a shoddy, rushed job on everything. Factor in some 'down-time.'
Attend a toy fair to view new brands and ideas in 2012.
So I, like most of you are I'm sure, sceptical about the end of the world in 2012. I always take the opinion if the world IS going to end, there is nothing I can do to stop it so I might as well enjoy the ride - hold D's hand and take as many people with me as possible when I go enjoy what's left.
Well this morning I woke up to something that looked a little like the end of the world was already here.
The forest at the back of my house was bending over, the rain that had fallen was rushing in waves across the floor, the contents of my garden furniture and planters were taking off, and all this through rain and hail so thick I could barely see out.
Once I got past feeling ... shocked. I spent a good ten minutes calling Kara to come in from outside....before discovering her sitting under the coffee table just staring at me. So I sat on the sofa with three pretty nervous cats, looked out again and thought...gees, if you told me today it was the end of the world...I'd believe you.
Then cursed D for being at work - I mean why-oh-why does he have to go back to work, why can't he just stay home with me all the time - sure I know we need the money for bills and rent and stuff, but seriously sometimes I'd rather starve and spend the day curled up with D watching movies - although having done this before I KNOW it doesn't work and I really prefer eating, having things...like a roof over my head...and seeing him before and after work.
But I digress...
Why is he AT WORK on the day the world is ending, talk about abandonment!
In the end I phoned my mum...who lives a mere 0.01 of a mile away, just to know I wasn't alone if in fact the world was ending...which it hasn't...because I'm still typing...
So, I guess we can all be as sceptical as we like or as much of a believer as we like that the world is going to end...but when it finally does (hopefully millions of years from now) we are all going to have the same dumbfounded look on our faces as I did this morning.
So...I'm back. I know you're all cheering inside. After my busyness with the business taking up almost all my blogging time, on the 13th I thought to myself "Hey, I deserve a holiday after this!"
My body, only half listening, or perhaps not listening at all; heard - "let's get really sick and stop functioning"
So I spent my holiday vomiting, dashing to the loo, falling the heck over, and hallucinating that I was in 10001 maniacs and they were trying to get me but...as I said to D before his worry levels for my health hit the roof... "Don't worry I have a plan".
I'm still not better but the toilet trips are fewer and further between and I see a specialist on Thursday. Woot.
A mere 3 weeks and 2 days since I began being ill....the Christmas service sucks.
According to my normal doctor, "something" caused my spleen to kill the majority of my blood and it all went downhill from there. Now instead of bouncing back to good health - I seem to be sprawled on my ass getting there one week at a time.
But I'm back now guys cause all this bile needs a way out and what better way than spewing it across the blog - no...not ready for that analogy yet?
I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and New Year - I have stories to share (ones that don't involve bodily functions) but they are for another day......or tomorrow...whatever.
